"When I was a Canadian national gymnast at such a high level, I didn’t know who Brittnee really was, and that’s my honesty. I didn’t embrace my culture. I didn’t understand my blackness. I was embarrassed by who I was. I didn’t feel pretty. It was this list of just not knowing, and when you don’t know yourself or love yourself, you can never be your best self."
Brittnee Habbib is the founder of Girl Powered. A hip-hop gymnastics dance program meant to build self-esteem for young Black girls. Habbib found it necessary to keep the program going when the pandemic hit by converting them to online classes. For Habbib, it is important to create spaces where her students feel visible and valued. In addition, understanding the cultural dynamics in the gymnastics world has shaped her into becoming her true self.
“On top of me not feeling comfortable with who I was, the environment that I was in really pushed that down even harder. They really did their best to show that blackness was not okay.”
The policing of black women athletes spans throughout history. Professional figure skater Surya Bonaly was a challenging athlete after she shocked the world in the 1994 Olympics by doing a backflip and landing on one foot. Her strength and control defied all odds, but the judges still underscored her. A thrilled audience overshadowed by a white crowd couldn’t change the outcome of what was considered an illegal move. Bonaly was different and talented. It wasn’t just her skills and attention to detail or her ability to gracefully entertain, but it was how she commanded the skating ring.
Nowadays, top athletes such as Simone Biles and Gabby Douglas often deal with the negativity and the pressures of what it’s like to be built differently. The aesthetic look of a gymnast replicates a ballerina. Neither Biles, Douglas or Bonaly exemplified that particular look. They were powerfully built, with natural curves. Tennis players Serena and Venus Williams have been ridiculed their entire careers for being naturally muscular and curvy. Habbib also found herself very different from her teammates.
“I was the only black girl on the team,” Habbib smirks, “and I faced a lot of racism, discrimination and really feeling like an outsider because I was the only black girl on that team. And I do have a very different body type. I‘m naturally big-busted. I was much taller than the rest of my teammates. My skin is brown. My hair, you know, didn’t stay down like all of my caucasian teammates. So it was a very difficult and challenging journey for me, but I learned a lot. And that’s where my need to start this black gymnastics program really came from. To create a safe space for these beautiful black young girls to love everything about themselves. To embrace their body; to love their hair.”
The balletic aesthetic body is secretly preferred. But if that's all that girls see, fitting in and limiting their potential to do and be more will prevent these young black girls from thriving. Habbib recalls being placed in the top 10 for team Canada in 2004 when she was told that she would not be moving forward to the championships.
“I stepped into this major league division, and by the end of that year, I placed top 10. Then, eight minutes later, after standing on that podium, team Canada pulled me aside and said, ‘I know you made top 10. They’re showing me the paperwork. But we’re not going to take you. We’re going to take number eleven.’ It was just that blunt. There were no ifs or buts about it. I got too good and too fast for them. And just like that, it didn’t matter how hard I worked or how much talent I had. As a black girl on the Canadian national team, I was always going to be treated differently.”
For habbib, dance is so much deeper than movement. To dance is to tell stories and share its history. Her passion comes from believing that black people don’t fully know the power that they have. “They haven’t expressed it. They haven’t explored it.” Support is still prevalent. Top athletes like Biles and track star Sha’Carrie Richardson are still defying the odds. At most, they are still rising through the ranks.
“As an artist, I help beautiful black people understand their power, and that can be done through so many different ways. It can be done through movement. Through dance. Through art. Through singing. Connecting to who we are and understanding who we are at such a deep level is really such a beautiful thing.”
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